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    Posted by dave:
    Im a 19 year old male with lots of sexual experience but I cant cum with a woman. I have sex regulary with my girlfriend usualy for quite sometime and we have tried everything but i always have to masterbate to cum I cant understand it because Im erect the whole time and my girlfriend really turns me on. I never thought of it as a problem in the past but its really getting my girlfriend down I would really appreciate any feedback from anyone


    Follow Ups:
    Reply by: RichT
    Hello Dave,
    First, I hope you are practicing SAFE SEX, and that does mean using a condom.
    "we have tried everything but i always have to masterbate to cum" - Okay, time to retrain your MIND. Your mind and penis have become SO used to the sensations that you give your penis when you masterbate so that is what your mind and penis are "programmed" into.

    SOOooo, NO masterbating for at least two weeks, and longer would be better. During that time have your girlfriend stimulate your penis manually/orally a couple of times a week. Not hard and fast, but in a loving sensuous teasing manner. A lubricant will also help to heighten the sensations during manual stimulation. My wife and I especially like Wet Platinum because it is very slippery and stays slippery for a very long time.

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    You may not ejaculate the first time she pleasures your penis, or the next time, but as long as you do not masterbate, it will not take long for your mind and penis to "connect" to the sensations from your girlfriend, and then you will ejaculate. I know it will be difficult not to masterbate, especially when you are highly aroused, but I would suggest that you do not. Take a cold shower if you need to "cool off". I'm sure it bothers both of you, but together you can overcome this problem. Just be patient with yourselves and with each other.

    Oh yes, may I suggest that you just lay down and TOTALLY relax while she is manually/orally stimulating your penis. Just focus on the wonderful feelings of pleasure she is giving to you. Don't even be concerned about ejaculating, just about enjoying the pleasure you are receiving. Encourage her, tell her what feels good that she is doing. And RELAX, RELAX!

    Reply by: Allen
    I am/was experiencing a similar situation. I found that my problem resulted from masterbation. I became used to orgasm due to a fast handstroke and it became more difficult to orgasm during sex, my advice, lay off masterbation or slow down when you do.

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